My wife and I have an appointement on Mon. w/ our marriage counselor. I still have not expressed my feelings and don't plan on doing so anytime soon. I have become so heart broken over this. I feel like I can not love my wife as long as I have such intense feelings for somebody else. I have also lost a grip on the dividing line between fantasy and reality. I used to know that I had no future with my T. Now I want to convince her to leave her happy marriage and risk the job she loves to be with me. I know this is not possible. But the thought of her not in my life is too painful.
I can't stand this amount of hurt. But I also do NOT want to let go of my transference feelings for my T. I'm in a really bad place right now.