To update you all, I went for a long walk with T and we discussed many things including transference. It hasn't been as strong compared with the time I first wrote. I entered the conversation as a friend with an idea of the things I needed to clarify and explore with her. The flow of conversation felt full of grace - relaxed and easy and mutually shared. I feel like have gained a very dear friend where there is deep levels of trust and respect between us. I feel blessed. I feel as if I have grown. I was able to say "I love you" to her without restraint or fear or being overwhelmed by the power of my own love. And she received it with joy.
We are making the transition to friends/colleagues and it feels good for me. The transference is my issue and we are both aware it will be there from time to time. I attend a therapeutic group facilitated by her and another (the third party) and I am finding the thought of attending that much easier. The trigger occurred at the last one and I am sure it will be present again - this time I can ask for that third party to hold the space for me, while T triggers me. In my opinion, there is nothing like some raw feelings to take me deeper into my being and the Beauty.
Thank you all for your support through the thick of it. I am looking forward to knowing myself in all the new ways that are now possible.
"All roads are made smooth as I gracefully surrender to the magnetic pull within my heart."