quote:The trick is hanging on to my adult self and my T while allowing the stuff to surface.
Hanging onto your adult-self sounds counter-productive. Unless I am misunderstanding something, doing that can get in your way- therapeutically. Accessing the right brain should be more “free flowing.” My T always states "let whatever comes up, come up." If you are intentionally holding onto your adult-self and to your T, isn't that a left brain tendency? Which would be more appropriate at the end of session where we may analyze what came up (or out of the right brain experience). I am sure that your T knows how to proceed, and if he is aware that you are hanging onto your adult-self, then I am sure that is not a problem as I perceive it. Just a thought I had as I read your post.
On the other hand, being aware of our present (we are an adult now and our T is sitting across from us) is a safety measurement keeping us grounded, but not distracted. So of course we want to do that, but it’s just awareness at that time. I know that letting go and giving full right brain exposure is difficult. Like you mentioned “the fear is not true but I need to experience more of it being not true before I'll trust it.”
We’ll get there AG. And as your T stated, “The truth is that the progress is real and you can trust it.” Such a simple statement but what an impact that has.
I look forward to hearing from you and how your session goes today.