I think the other thing that "In Session" helped with was to realize that for therapists who were competent that even though the boundaries were important to maintain, the relationship was a real one for the therapist also and they do really care for their patients.One of the scariest things about transference is that sickening feeling of powerlessness. That this person is so very important to you, is at the center of your life (at one point it really felt like if I lost my T, I would die)but you might mean nothing to them. That it was just a job and you were just an annoyance. From the therapists that Deborah Lott interviewed, that wasn't true. I found that very comforting because even though my T was telling me the relationship was a real one, it felt like he "had" to say that so it was good having it confirmed by an outside disinterested source.

AG