Good idea, JM. This was a great book. I read it at least 3 times and I have given it to my T to read. I wish I had it back because I like to re-read parts of it to reassure myself that these very intense feelings I have for him are somewhat normal. There is something written on page 41 that really resonated with me. I wish I had the book to quote exactly but generally what it said was that ... It is inherently tragic that we invest so much of ourselves and come to care so much about someone who we will never truly know and are destined to lose. It's at the bottom of the page. Each time I read this I know it's true and it breaks my heart. I have come to accept the fact that I cannot know my T in his "other" life, nor be a part of it. Or at least I think I do. Sometimes (like tonight) it is just so hard to turn off my feelings and walk out that door. I want to pound the walls. But there are other times when I feel that we have such a special and emotionally intimate relationship that I would not trade it for anything. Reading this book has explained some of what I'm feeling and why. I found the chapter of The Approximate Relationship fascinating.

TN