That's crazy that your T wasn't keep progress notes!! Were you under insurance at that time? I'm not sure if it makes a difference. What I'm wondering if there is any way you could appeal and perhaps see if they would accept a letter from your T about your general progress in treatment? I wouldn't want my personal therapy notes on my record either (unfortunately, some of them are because I've been in the hospital before and they write down any and everything). It sucks.
I don't think you should have to put up with being pressured. Maybe you can talk to someone higher up the "food chain" at your insurance company?? That just doesn't feel... acceptable and you should not have to suffer so badly because of your therapist not making the correct progress notes. I've always had insurance to I know my Ts have to do that
I've never been in this situation, but I really do feel it is unfair - this made me frustrated to read!! I feel for you - insurance companies love to make life difficult, I'd really try to contact someone higher or appeal. :/ I hope you can.
I also wanted to say... I know many trauma survivors or whatever it is you have been through suffer a lot of shame when we are finally able to talk to people and it is so scary to think of other people just seeing that information. There is no shame in pursuing your mental health, there is still that stigma there and those who have that stigma are missing out on the wonderful work you've been able to do in your therapy. Ya know? That's what I'd try to tell myself I guess if I HAD to have my T's notes give up.... but yea it is a catch 22 because I also feel like I wouldn't let that happen.
Ugh.. what a bind.
Good Luck on everything.
For what it's worth,