Al-Anon is for families, relatives, and friends whose lives have been affected by someone else’s drinking (addictions). If someone close to you, such as a family member, friend, co-worker, or neighbor, has or has had a drinking (addiction) problem, the following questions may help you determine if Al-Anon is for you.
1. Do you constantly seek approval and affirmation?
2. Do you fail to recognize your accomplishments?
3. Do you fear criticism?
4. Do you overextend yourself?
5. Have you had problems with your own compulsive behavior?
6. Do you have a need for perfection?
7. Are you uneasy when your life is going smoothly, continually anticipating problems?
8. Do you feel more alive in the midst of a crisis?
9. Do you still feel responsible for others, as you did for the problem drinker (addict) in your life?
10. Do you care for others easily, yet find it difficult to care for yourself?
11. Do you isolate yourself from other people?
12. Do you respond with fear to authority figures and angry people?
13. Do you feel that individuals and society in general are taking advantage of you?
14. Do you have trouble with intimate relationships?
15. Do you confuse pity with love, as you did with the problem drinker (addict)?
16. Do you attract and/or seek people who tend to be compulsive and/or abusive?
17. Do you cling to relationships because you are afraid of being alone?
18. Do you often mistrust your own feelings and the feelings expressed by others?
19. Do you find it difficult to identify and express your emotions?
20. Do you think someone’s drinking (addiction) may have affected you?
Alcoholism (Addiction) is a family disease. Those of us who have lived with this disease as children sometimes have problems which the Al-Anon program can help us to resolve.
(From Survival To Recovery: growing up in an alcoholic home (book) and "Did you grow up with a problem drinker?" pamphlet - Al-anon, and available online.)
Maybe this will be helpful for anyone wondering if they "qualify" for ACOA?
Also, a side note - from my understanding (and please correct me if I am wrong!) AA was the "birth" of the 12 steps of recovery. From there, Al-anon was born, and they adopted the 12 steps nearly verbatim, changing 2 words, I believe. All the other recovery groups (NA, OA, CA, ACOA, GA, etc) stem from the original 12 steps and have adapted them for their purpose. So while I went to Al-anon, I could still easily go to ACOA meetings if I so chose, even though my parents weren't the drinkers, they were and are the druggies, instead.