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Thanks, reading now. Relating a lot to it...this is the kind of stuff I've been wanting T to explain to me, because the intellectual/observer/executive "me" can deal better with accepting my crazy, unpredictable states if I get what the heck is going on.

Preverbal assumptions:
quote:
These core beliefs and
assumptions are often relatively nonresponsive to superficial verbal reassurance or the expressed alternate views of
others later in life, since they are not, in fact, verbally-mediated. For example, the individual who believes, at a
basic level, that she is unlikable or unattractive to others, or that others are not to be trusted will not easily change
such views based on others' declarations that the person is valued by them or that they can be relied upon.


Well, I feel a little less stupid that I can't get my feeling parts to accept T's repeated statements about me and him and our connection.

Both this article and the attachment article made me think that my attachment style is more of the "fearful" type than the "preoccupied" type, although this is the first time I've heard about the fearful type. I also find this to be very true and explanatory of why I can respond to the same messages and types of interactions from my pastor and my therapist with completely different states of emotion/thought.

quote:
Interestingly, it appears that many individuals have different attachment styles in different situations, partially
depending on what relational memories or schemata are cued or “primed” at any given period of time.



quote:
In some cases, this
generalization will result in negative CERs to a variety of potential interpersonal relationships, especially those
involving intimacy, closeness, or vulnerability.


Um yeah, pretty much ANY intimate/vulnerable connection makes me panic.


quote:
As opposed to narrative memories, implicit, sensory recollection is generally devoid of autobiographic
material, and is often experienced as an intrusion of unexpected sensation (e.g., sights or sounds of an event) rather
than of remembering, per se.


OK, that creeps me out, because this is an EXACT description of the stuff that has been coming up for me that I keep saying, "There is no way that can be real." Frowner I don't want it to be real...and it is not necessarily real, I guess, but I guess it also could be. And it would make a lot of sense.


quote:
In other words, explicit, verbally-mediated memory material may be most
aversive for its ability to activate associated nonverbal feelings, implicit/sensory memories, and abuse-related
schema.


I suppose, this is why I have to constantly ask T to change his approaches and ways of wording things to me. Sometimes, even though I know that my being upset with him is because he has said or done something that mirrors interactions I had with others in the past, I cannot avoid my states getting triggered by it.


quote:
Even the defensive
strategies of “expert” suppressors, however, can be relatively easily overwhelmed by exposure to stimuli in the
environment that are reminiscent in some way of the suppressed material. This may be especially true for thoughts
and memories of prior painful interpersonal experiences (i.e., those especially distressing to the individual, and thus
more likely to be suppressed) that are triggered by later, similar stimuli in the interpersonal domain.


Ugh...T triggers this type of stuff in me all the time recently. I wonder if that's part of why my dissociative symptoms have been increasing.


quote:
This concept refers to the individual’s capacity to control and tolerate strong
(especially negative) affect, without resorting to avoidance strategies such as dissociation, substance abuse, or
external tension-reducing behavior...As well, it will be suggested later in this chapter that affect regulation skills can be learned later in
life, generally in ways parallel to their development in a healthy, normal childhood environment.


Wait, is that an argument FOR my T hugging me? Wink

...more response later when I get time to finish reading. On page 6 right now, time to spend some time with H. Smiler

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