quote:

These wise women have been able to explain transference in a way I could really understand.

I’m not sure that it is any more wisdom than it is experience, of which we ALL have an abundance of both, but it’s also about validation. Personally I can easily share my feelings and opinions with others, but I find my own healing and understanding come from the validation brought on by the experiences of others. And just so that you know, I am working it out as I go along just like every one else.

When it comes to value, I have found that some of the simplest and most direct posts by one and all to be just as important and insightful as any around here. I miss certain ones when they cannot be around for whatever reasons. I sure hope it is not because they fear they have nothing valuable to share, because that is not true. It is the diversity that makes this such a wonderful community that I keep coming back to. So please don’t sell yourself short River. I always look forward to reading your posts as I do Attachment Girls, Robin/Scott/Antoni/Samy’s, BW’s, Sarah’s, and others whom we have not heard from in a very long time. Of course I can’t leave out Shrinklady who must be up to her ears in trying to keep up with things around here, but it is all valuable, helpful, and well rounded experiences whether it is from Shrinklady and any one of the newbies around here. Whatever brings us here and encourages us or concerns us is worth sharing no matter how insignificant it might seem to ourselves; it is probably exactly what someone else needs to relate to.

I remember one of the episodes I posted about being frustrated with my T. I had some really nice responses, but one of the most poignant was from Scott who simply said “I say to my T on occasion... 'sometimes, all you need to do is to say sorry'...” That’s not to diminish the other replies at all, because they were all helpful and I cherished reading every one.

So why I am inclined to be giving some sort of lecture here?? I am sorry, it wasn’t intended to be a lecture at all, but PLEASE know how valuable you are around here, River. I relate to so many things you say, including your transference for others besides your T. I never knew what that was before, but in looking back at certain relationships in my past, I see it for what it is now. –Thank you!

JM

*I hope this came out ok.* Otherwise feel free to use AG's HTML slapper she invented.