"If remembering is not enough what is missing is re-experiencing. Gill believes that because the client's difficulties were acquired through experience, they must be transformed through experience. They cannot be reasoned away. While it is necessary for clients eventually to understand the roots of their difficulties, that understanding cannot be merely delivered as an explanation. It must emerge as clients re-experience certain aspects of their past. And this re-experiencing must occur within the therapeutic relationship" (1997, p. 57).
I think this is KEY. Your T just cannot tell you how to feel or how you should react to things... you have to experience the difference with them through therapy.
TN