The limitation to the last three months made this poll interesting to me, because it would have been answered much differently even six months or a year ago.

The only time I've done a non-scheduled call to T and left a message (i.e. didn't hang up before it even rang on my end out of terror, lol), was when he wasn't answering scheduling texts and I really needed to know what was going on. We've had other phone calls in the past, but they were scheduled check-in calls or phone sessions. And those rarely happen anymore, only if a session is not otherwise possible or I'm in crisis.

As for texting, this seems to be T's preferred method of contact, because he can check and answer them promptly and is not likely to forget about them as he does with email (he travels between offices without a computer, so he would only have access by his phone on work days and couldn't send anything much longer than a text anyway). I answered 2-5 time a week. It's more on the five exchanges a week end of things, maybe a little more, but about half of them are scheduling related, because my sessions, while the same general day and time of day, are not the exact same time every week. For example, I'm his last session of the day on Mondays, and sometimes that is 7:00pm and sometimes 8:00pm. I also am not really counting texts I send to let him know I'm home safe and how I'm doing after the session. Because of the dissociation and driving having been a problem in the past, and because it's a connected feeling for both of us (my assuming he cares to know I'm home safe and his actually caring, lol), I still do it every session. OK, so it might be closer to 6-10, if you count scheduling.

I used to email journals to him about once a week, but I can talk to him so much more easily in session now, so I haven't been sending him any. It seems I'm sending him one every month or two when there's a topic I have to write to work through. We have only ever processed them in sessions. I do not get any replies. For a while, some of them went into SPAM and I didn't know he wasn't "up to date" on what was going on with me (creating some ouchy interactions), so on the rare occasion I email him, I send him a text to let him know now.

T has always been very encouraging of me to check in with him as much as I feel I need. It was his suggestion in the first place. He welcomes the attachment. He does not, however, have a set of expectations around it. I had to learn to tolerate a lot of discomfort with: 1) Needing to learn to ask for what I need (reply vs. not); 2) Inconsistent schedule availability to reply (sometimes quick and detailed replies vs. a long wait or a very quick one) and not reading into it meaning anything about his feelings toward me. It has been a growing experience, but it would have gone a lot smoother if T had just said up front that he does not always reply, I may wait up to a day for a reply, and I need to follow up and ask for what I need from him. I kind of had to figure that out from experience, people on this forum, and risking to tell him what came up from his replies (or lack thereof).

Now, I don't fret quite so much about the contact stuff unless I have something else coming up that is already making me feel disconnected and worthless.

Sorry, that was almost hilariously long.