I am new to this forum and this is my first post. Hi everyone.

I am suffering in horrendous pain over the love...excuse me, erotic transference I feel for my T. I have been with her for 3 1/2 years. Always found her to be very beatiful, but in the last 6 months have really fallen off the deep end for her. And the killer is that she is happily married and holds all the professional boundaries.

I have talked about this with her. Cried about it with her for more than a dozen hours. The pain this causes me is worse than any of the original trauma from my childhood. Sure, I know it echoes that pain, but this is a new wound more painful than I can fathom. It is excruciating. I wonder if I'll ever be happy again knowing that I can never have who I really and truly want to spend my life with.

How do I deal with this? Her suggestion so far is to keep talking about it to 'work it through' (WTF does that mean?) I hurt so badly. Last week I went to a consult with a P and really amped up my anti-depressents. Great. Now I have to take A-d's to deal with the pain from my therapy?

I am ranting a bit, but if anyone has dealt with this, please let me know how you did it. My scenario is excruciating. At times, I just want to end it all to make the pain stop.