my caseworker is still off sick. wont get to see her for the 2nd week in a row and now idea as to when she even might be back.
feeling upset, frustrated and let down - my T helped me organize this caseworker for the purpose of SUPPORTING me while my T was away… i'm meant to see her weekly - 2 cancelled in a row now.
i had a txt from a male co worker to tell me its cancelled again as my caseworker is off on sick leave. last week i asked him 'what if i need support in the meantime?' to which he said 'we';; keep in touch'. but i don't want his support - i don't know him and i really can't 'do' support from a strange man. i feel too unsafe.
at leat i did meal my pdoc how i am feeling. its always hard to tell her how bad is BAD when i lose touch with how I'm feeling so fast… i can feel really really good (like yesterday) and forget and have ZERO comprehension of how bad it felt when i felt really bad …. and today, with my mood very very low - i can't in any way relate to how good i felt just 24 hours ago …
im glad i emailed my pdoc - i said i was emailing because if i left her a message to phone me back, if she did at the end of the day and my mood had lifted, i wouldn't be able to explain how low it had been (even though only a few hours would have passed).
so at least she will know how bad is 'bad' when she reads my email.
sigh.