quote:

Oh and my T has children my age. Sometimes that is hard because I imagine what it would be like to have a mom like her.

I actually found something on *this* forum, in a post way back (likely a few years back) when I was browsing that really helped me deal with this concept better. My T is not old enough to be my mom (which is really helpful for me!) but my boss is. It's the nature of my job to work closely with my boss at times, and I've grown very attached to her. She has two daughters my age and I used to wish with all my heart that she was my mom.

Recently, though, thanks to this forum, I realized that if she *was* my mom, then our relationship would be completely different. She wouldn't be able to help me the way she is able to, as she'd have a different emotional connection and wouldn't be able to be as objectively supportive, if that makes sense? I will see if I can find the thread where I read it. It was so profound for me, and has been a huge help in getting over seeing my attachment figures as my mom, and instead seeing them as the wonderfully, supportive, caring people they are.