I think the same things, too, Ang. And when my T seemed, perhaps, shocked at one of the things I told her, it was very hard to share more. Because I kept thinking all of the same things. She's human, too, and seems to care..so how could this not affect her in some way? And I didn't want to have a part in that.

I'm still struggling with that a lot. But in some ways it has helped to share some of those things with her. I just keep checking in with her - quite often - to make sure she's still OK with me and with what I told her. And although I don't feel it now, I know that with time I can come to believe that she's still OK with me. The same would be true for you and your T. Have you shared with him why you're afraid to say anything? Have you told him just what you told me?